Seville - life lived outside, warm and inviting. Narrow streets meant for walking, turning corners and suddenly seeing a doorway, an insight to another life.
Dubai - life lived inside. This is my favorite picture of the people in the mall viewing the people in the ski slope. None of the malls had windows onto the outside world -- what's there to see but other buildings and the dirty remains of a desert? And during the hot, hot summers windows become impractical. The ski slope is the Dubai we see on news reports -- this is the Dubai the emir wants us to know about. Not the crowded, congested Dubai where many live, or the endless apartments of Sharjah and Ajman. This picture of the ski slope reminds me of Second Life -- people standing around, unconnected to each other, watching and waiting for something to happen.
And then there is Paris -- romantic and cold (in all aspects of that word.) What more can I say? It was lovely to experience Paris with my partner, Peter as he re-experienced places of his youth, walking familiar streets, eating at familiar places. Unlike Dubai (which changed everyday) Paris was essentially the same as 20 years ago.
I'm at a loss of how to get this masters done.
Loss of momentum, loss of desire, and I question why I was doing this in the first place.
And then there is Paris -- romantic and cold (in all aspects of that word.) What more can I say? It was lovely to experience Paris with my partner, Peter as he re-experienced places of his youth, walking familiar streets, eating at familiar places. Unlike Dubai (which changed everyday) Paris was essentially the same as 20 years ago.
I'm at a loss of how to get this masters done.Loss of momentum, loss of desire, and I question why I was doing this in the first place.
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2 comments:
Umm...career opportunities. To strengthen your position with the firm, and there existed a longshot of possibility setting up a Northern California office. If that didn't pan out, you would at least have a Masters under your belt (from Columbia) - not a bad plan. You also wanted to assert some independence (take charge of your career) as you anticipated leaving NC. It's still a good plan. Sure the palace politics sucked the air out of things - but this step wasn't about them. What was the thing that kept you motivated while in NYC? How did you manage your time? Can't you re-imagine the thesis? Seek out an advisor (possibly not even connected to your program - just a smart friend who can keep you honest or at least stimulated in a healthy way. I'm sure the anxiety is thick - but you can choose to release it. Rainy season is coming - that'll make hunkering down seem more natural.
thanks hickcity for the reminder. it was easier to keep going in NY because everything was clearly defined - classes, papers, work, apt, subway rides; everything had deadlines all the time. i am without boundaries - it's been a long time since i've been here. i need more objective pressure if that makes sense. will write more.
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