Sunday, May 24, 2009

The Finished Masters


Well, this blog did its thing. I am complete now. This blog is finished, ended, kaput. The Unfinished Masters is no more.

As proof I submit the world's goofiest graduation photo, captured by husband Peter just in time, crossing many red velvet lines, breaking all rules to bring this to you. I had only 2 seconds to stand.

Thanks to all my readers for their support. I could not have done this without you. When I start my next blog, I'll let you know.

See linked image below for complete set of photos:
graduation 2009 photos

Keep in touch.

cheers, rani

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Graduating - May 19

Well, it's done.

After speaking with my adviser today, she approved my last and final course (Programming II equivalency) and is submitting final paperwork for graduation.

I'm graduating. May 19.

It hasn't really sunk in yet -- I don't quite know what to do with myself.

So dear readers, my final post will be after May 19th with photos of said graduation ceremony. And then it will be goodbye, for this blog has fulfilled it's role.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

MA Thesis and Project - accepted!!!

Can you believe it? I'm done with the MA thesis and project! I just want to cry.

My adviser complimented on my work and asked permission to share my MA project with other students as a model project! Wow, I can't believe it?

I'm so happy.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Draft 2 (final?) - submitted

Quick note - revisions to MA paper submitted last night. Hopefully this will be the final draft. Now to focus on Java certification. Deadline is April 30.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Feedback - Draft 1

Well, the initial feedback from draft 1 arrived in my inbox yesterday. She "really liked" the paper (whew!), but can't open the flash files I sent. I rushed to meet a deadline and didn't have time to convert to an earlier more compatible format. Then she ended up being out for a week :-} There were of course, some very valid questions on sections of my argument/thesis, and other minor edits. Overall - a day's or so of work.

What I'm really curious about is how she will react the actual 'games' once she's able to play them. Waiting for the other shoe to drop, I keep thinking she'll take it all back and say "it's not good enough."

I'm having a hard time believing that this paper/project is worthy because it really didn't turn out like I wanted or expected. But I know that I had to do it the way I did it to get it out of my system. This particular design is something that I had to try. And now I have a better understanding of the limitations of content and form. I have a better understanding of why I struggled with this so. Even though intellectually I thought I understood what makes a better instructional design, the old teacher-centric models on how it ought to be done keep seeping back in. Conditioning and retraining of the mind are not so easily done. Not so easy to change the way you think; not so easy to change your metaphors.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Marmalade, Jam & Java

As I wait for feedback on my first draft, I've been busy knocking a few things off my list that have been hanging around for a while.

image courtesy SimplyRecipes

For instance, the 2 dozen+ Seville oranges I bought back in late January, early February. Well, the contractors for some crazy reason, decided to eat 3 -- and realized that they were bitter and sour (HELLO!). Then, byyesterday, 3 had rotted. So that left about 18-20. Made the first batch and wow - are they sour or what! It's marmalade alright. Pete should like it. Next batch I'll adjust for my sweeter tastes -- less rind, more sugar. Yum!

It's also the beginning of strawberry season in California. There was someone selling half-dozen pints by the side of the road, so a friend and I split them. About a 1/3 were perfectly ripe and delicious for eating (shared with the contractors, they liked.) The rest were a little tart - perfect for jam. So I made a quickie strawberry jam. Didn't quite set right -- fruit to sugar ratio was probably off -- and wowser -- so sweet. Will adjust down. Maybe I should try a strawberry orange mix...will let you know.

7 jars of marmalade so far, 7 jars of strawberry jam.

And Java -- as in the programming language. Restarted my studying and realized I would just die if I had to do another moment of the online course -- so incredibly tedious and boring. It puts me to sleep with 20 minutes. Better than Ambien. So I bought a recommended book and will slam through that -- just need to get this certification done in 2-3 weeks or so.

Hmmmm...what else can I make into a jam?

Monday, March 23, 2009

Draft 1 - sent!!

Whew! Tired.

First draft of paper and first draft of games sent for review. This was huge for me. Next up Java certification and revisions. Recommendation for graduation has to be handed in April 30.

Celebrate with me.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

In the midst of it

Just a quick note this week as I'm in the midst of writing the MA thesis. The programming on my project is at a good point -- it still needs 2-3 days more work. I'm hoping to complete the writing portion by March 17th -- slightly behind schedule -- and the entire project by end of this upcoming week.

The writing process

The writing is going well, I can get about 6-7 good hours of writing in per day. I'm not a fast writer and I tend to write once, revise modestly as the real work is in organizing the thoughts. I've become familiar with this process having written many essays over the past few years: re-read my key articles, take notes and quotes, re-read a few past essays - pull out relevant quotes -- that takes about a day. Then I start writing after puttering and forcing myself to sit. Take break, putter, sit. On and on. Occasionally take breaks to detail the shower, do yoga, or get some food shopping done (and yes, get distracted by a Netflix movie maybe ONCE).

What interesting about my process now is how much less anxiety I have around doing the writing, which I had even last spring. I let go of something - my job, expectations I had for myself, who knows. All that matters now is that I can see the end and a new future beyond it.

Back to it.

Friday, March 6, 2009

Haikus: Green Dot & DukeCE

Often when I work on essays and programming, poetry emerges spontaneously. Today in celebration of a programming victory I write this haiku:

Green Dot Haiku:

the green dot is freed
possibilities abound
to become all things

Getting a green dot to move between 2 black boxes seems like such a trivial thing when I write it out. What is not seen is the work in understanding the architecture of the language, getting the grammar just right, to do what you imagine is possible. Once I was able to write the lines of code that did this one simple thing, all things become possible now. I have emerged victorious.

An older haiku for DukeCE:

Duke CE the dream
we had once big ideas
changing others, changed me

Onwards.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Climbing the Mountain

When you have what seems to be an insurmountable task, how do you begin? How do you begin to climb the mountain? You've been looking at, dreaming about the mountain for weeks and it keeps getting bigger everyday.

"Bird by bird" as hickcity said. But what if you don't even know what the "bird" is in your mountain? How do you break it down?

Halfway up this mountain and I'm still not sure how I got here.

Something like this: Game by game. Interaction by interaction.

p.s. Yes that is me doing indoor rock climbing. Hand over hand, don't look down.

Saturday, February 28, 2009

Trudgery

Trudgery is not a word but it should be. Trudge is a verb meaning slow, laborious walking. Drudgery is noun meaning hard, menial work. I'm at the trudgery part of the Masters: doing slow laborious work that is often hard, mostly tedious...and occasionally satisfying.

Next deadline of March 15 is coming up -- first draft of project and paper due. There's even a chance I'll get there. Every once in a while though, my brain just stops working, like earlier today. Now I'm back at it. Such is my Saturday night. This reclusive life is getting to me.

Onwards!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Reflections on my own Learning

In the past few weeks, I've been on a steep learning curve for Flash & AS3. I've modified and reused a couple of games, and took days to figure out the main interface; still have to figure out how all these components communicate with each other. All the while still on track towards Java certification.

Coming up for air recently, I had a few observations.

  • The learning process is non-linear. Yes, maybe it would have been more efficient to pick up ONE book and go through it step-by-step. Yes, perhaps I should have learned Flash before diving into ActionScript 3 -- but I didn't. For whatever reason, I choose to start with AS3 (because I knew some Java and wanted to do something cool and didn't want to mess with animation techniques) and then went back and learned Flash. Learning Flash then felt relevant and it went very fast.
  • Learning is ad hoc. This goes with the non-linear. Ad hoc is often used to mean improvised and impromptu. However, I like the alternate dictionary definition: "concerned or dealing with a specific subject, purpose, or end." I learn what I need when I need it, and by googling specific phrases, searching through my books, or trying it multiple ways until it works -- somehow I find the answer -- or decide to do something different.
  • Learning is appreciative & problem-based. I learn when I'm trying to solve a particular problem. Problem: How do I get this thing to work right? Appreciative Inquiry: How do I do it better? Is this the best mechanic to use?
  • Learning needs multiple examples. This to me is *the* most important point. By using multiple examples, multiple analogies, multiple tools can I formulate a solution. I learn primarily by example then an understanding why those examples work. Through examples I can create my own models and my own theories on particular subjects. Through the use of salient examples (bringing out key points), I can improve my ability to learn quicker.
Providing multiple salient examples allows learners to understand what is important and allows learners to create their own mental models. Then perhaps, in contrasting those models with an experts point-of-view we learn more. We have to engage with the material, provide elaborations and understandings that are relevant to us.

How does one create the design of learning space to reflect this?

It's a conflict, no? We're suppose to teach a specific thing, a specific model. Everyone must have the same picture in their heads (industrial view of learning). How do we accommodate their background, their experience as adults? Experiences that often ameliorate understandings of what is taught? Perhaps what we need to teach is creating a common language around a set of experiences from which we build our models. Then use theories and expert models to push the boundaries of the problem space, to imagine something different.

Here's the rub -- it takes time to learn in this way -- more time than is usually allotted. I'm learning by doing, learning by example, and learning deeply. And it's slow going. But in this case, I'm not just learning, I'm changing how I think of myself in relation to my work. Reconfiguring those brain cells is hard work. Not quite there yet -- wish me speed so I can make my self-imposed deadline of graduating in May 2009.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Passion in Learning: to be more fully human

When I wrote about Emotion and Designing Learning I was examining the idea proposed by Carmen Taran that instructional designers need to have chemistry with their content -- which I interpreted as passion for the content. This post received many comments - and V. Yonkers proposed the idea that people needed curiousity about what they were designing -- but not neccessarily passion. As I continue on my quest to design a game around accounting, I am agreeing with her more and more. Good instructional design requires curiousity, it requires our intellectual and emotional attention, it requires a passion for the design process as Jason W. pointed out, and identifying with a project as Mike B points out.

Still I couldn't let go of the idea of passion. And then I came across an article with this quote:


To be motivated, to have passion, is not merely to be working toward pre-determined goals, but to be swept away by the power of an idea or the drama inherent in all educative, transformative events.
Beyond Control and Rationality: Dewey, Aesthetics, Motivation, and Educative Experiences by David Wong

It made my heart sing! To incite passion in the learning, to remember that education can mean having fun, being in the flow. To be swept away by an idea -- haven't we all had this at some point in our lives?

South of Big Sur, CA, USA (Dec 2006)


Now back down to earth -- in our everyday working lives, in the world of constraints, we can't always have this. But we can aspire to this in our work, everyday. As David Wong continues to say in his article -- "to teach is to inspire." Yes it's a cliche, and it's true. If we as instructional designers cannot try to inspire with what we design, then why do we do the work we do?

Educators, at their best, create experiences in which students can feel more fully alive, more fully human. Perhaps, it is hard to imagine that learning can be so moving. Our darkest, most weary cynicism dismisses this vision of education as idealistic, romanticized, and too difficult to achieve. However, in the end the truth is this: we only wish our learning could be so compelling.
Beyond Control and Rationality

To be more fully human: to make a connection through words, images, sounds to another person's mind. To have them leap with you. "Whether the learner is engaged in reading a story, watching a film, or conducting scientific inquiry, anticipation is what moves us to the edge of our seat so that we may see better and be better prepared for what we might see." This is instructional design should aspire to: to have others anticipate what's coming next and anticipate what they are thinking, feeling and imagining -- and perhaps take them to places they never imagined.

Yes, I'm a dreamer.

Thank you E. David Wong.

For Further Reading:

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

The Human Moment: Fidelity

This post is dedicated to Schon B - who inspired me with the article and human moments of her own when I most needed them.

Recently I re-read an article called the "The Human Moment at Work" by Edward M. Hallowell (HBR.) The gist of the article is that physical presence and attention constitutes the human moment, and we are losing human moments as we are increasingly using technology to mediate interactions in the workplace. This results in misunderstandings, loss of morale through increased alienation and isolation, and increased anxiety. Hallowell also notes that he realizes that misunderstandings can happen regardless, but they happen more often through technology. He cites brain chemistry research underlying the human moment -- remember those studies about how when babies aren't cuddled as infants they become messed up? Yup, that brain chemistry. We actually need other people in our lives to keep us healthy. Ok - I buy it.

This concept was first brought up to me in the context of Second Life (SL) and how SL would never be as good as Real Life (RL). At the time, I never imagined that any tech would replace the human interactions. I think we need the human moments -- especially in the workplace -- to ground us.

In thinking about the human moment one word came up for me -- fidelity. Even though I don't think technology will ever replace face-to-face or brain-to-brain interactions, I do think it can become less attenuated the higher the fidelity of the technology. (Oiy, be careful of those double negatives.)

What do I mean by fidelity? The quality of the sounds, the quality of the writing, the effectiveness of the design -- all of these things add to fidelity. Way back, in 1996, when I was first introduced to all this tech stuff, I remember interface design being defined as "mind meets computer." I realize now that is false. It's "mind meets mind." For what is the computer and its interfaces but the design of one human for another. The design/writing/quality allows another to enter your mind. How well those minds meet is the fidelity of the conversation. (Have we not been moved by a beautiful, clear sound? by a poem that is never fogotten? by a design that meets and surprises us?)

And then I came across this small 3 min radio piece on NPR: "Reading creates simulations in the mind." The gist: language is a powerful form of virtual reality; when we read we create simulations in the mind as if we were actually doing that thing that is described; we can control what happens in other people's brains with our words. What controls the fidelity of those "simulations in the mind"? How are they different or similar to what happens in the "human moment"?

Somewhere I had read, perhaps in the book The Body Has a Mind of Its Own, that when we observe or think about something, as opposed to actually doing it, the simulations are there in our mirror neurons, but not with as much strength as if we were doing it ourselves. "Mirror neurons map the actions, intentions and emotions of others directly into your own system of body maps, creating as close to a telepathic link as the known laws of nature allow. They allow you to understand and empathize with the minds of others, not through conceptual reasoning, but through direct simulation via your own body maps."

The human moment --> language as virtual reality --> mirror neurons: is it not possible to create better human-lite moments through technology? Is it not possible to imagine yourself in another's mind -- whether that is mediated through film, radio, or online interactions? It may not have all the chemistry of the human moment, but it will have a fidelity all of its own.

*Image courtesy of Janis Cromer as posted on Daily Kos

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Deadline 2 and revisions to concept

Well, here we go! My adviser is submitting the forms for graduation this week (thanks SL), fees have been paid and now it's just code, code, code and write until it is done. Simple, eh?


I revised my proposal fleshing out the details of the game flow and pedagogy behind the game elements. The proposal forms the basis of the paper, the concept map forms the basis of the code. I include some of the visual elements for your viewing pleasure. (Did I mention, that I LOVE Woordle - it's how I got the word map above.)

Concept map:

A few observations -- the game that I want to create is complex. If I can get the basic framework,, some of the aesthetic elements, and one version of each type pedaogical element (mini-game, mini-case, etc.) then I'm golden. Wish me luck!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Learning Design (Training Design? eTech Design?)

Recently while catching up on my blogreader, I came across Tony Karrer's post on Training Design: eLearning Technology writing about how his training design has been changing over the years. It got me thinking about this Masters project and how I have been trying to come up with a instructional design process that made sense to me. Design to me is like a tag cloud, intially more of an intuitive process that gets refined over time.

Maybe you start with learners, topic, technology (the design challenge) and each of those words has metadata assoicated with it: tags. These tags bring up other concepts/words -- yes just like using del.ic.io.us. From this it is a winnowing/refining process... anyways...i was quite fuzzy in my post on his blog (actually am still fuzzy.) As you move through the metadata you make a path, a schema. From there emerges your personal design process -- maybe you can abstract into a model at this point. I've since refined my thinking a little and came up with this picture -- that currently makes sense to me. See below:


All I'm really trying to communicate is that perhaps we think too linearly about a process that is essentially non-linear -- given all the new web 2.0 technologies that are out there -- we scan, skim, and pop! through data, and sometimes we dive. Are our design processes any different?

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Deadline 1 - done!

Well, one week late, but I got the proposal out the door. Yeah! Hopefully my adviser will respond soon (she is on vacation in the Caribbean.)

From Dec'08 - Deserts

Unlike the first 2 drafts I wrote, the final one felt doable, especially as a proof of concept. The best thing about it, whatever I finish I feel I could use on the job market -- and that feels good. Also feel like the design is something that can grow over time and be used for different disciplines. I like that.

Now onto the next 3 things - will try to get something in so I can attend the Games Developer Conference in March (thanks for the suggestion Carla); will reshape a paper I wrote last spring -- which upon second reading is pretty good -- as a thought paper for potential employers (such as DukeCE); and yes, need to finish Module 5 of the Java course -- truly one the most tedious e-learning experiences of my life.

Onwards!

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Learning: Demystify & Non-linear

Sometimes it takes a while to remember the why of what you do -- sometimes that happens in the middle of the night.

Many years ago, 1996 to be more exact, I was in a program called InfoTech at Capliano College. It was a 10 month intensive multimedia program -- it was one of the best learning experiences of my life. Before that I knew almost nothing about computers or the Internet. That program launched my web design career, gave me the skills to find work in the States (was living in Canada at the time), and it was also one of the most creative periods of my life.

Back then I started many designs, most of which I never had time to finish. Those are coming back to me now (the files do exist, somewhere in storage...)

At the time I was very much interested in the non-linearity of learning and in demystifying bodies of knowledge. That desire to demystify started my current interest in accounting and finance (aka money). There was an interface design I did back then to demystify the words on the back of a chocolate bar wrapper* that I called the "Wall of Words" -- a beautiful, neon-like, glowing list of food additives (how I loved Photoshop back in the day) that you could click on to find out more about what was in your chocolate bar. Simple concept, beautifully executed. What I also liked about this design was the way you could access knowledge - in a non-linear way. It reminds me of how one learns a new domain knowledge -- it's usually not in a sequential manner laid out in text books - -it's more haphazard. It also reminds me a tag cloud.

Having written the second draft of my proposal I will revise one more time. This is my way in. I realize now that it's not the mechanic I've been looking for but the visceral experience of being overwhelmed when faced with learning a new thing; and the frustration and pleasure of discovering one's own way through the wall. To demystify a domain in a non-linear way. This is a experience that I can play with in many different ways.

I can sleep now.

*this was part of a larger project to demystify chocolate and understand the complexities of making this divine food.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

First deadline for the new year

Well my first deadline for the new year has arrived. I am halfway through my proposal and I'm stuck at the place I always get stuck at -- the mechanic of the game. I know the pedagogy, I've got the research about what else is out there and a good description of the content what I'm doing - but haven't hit on a game mechanic that feels good.

The mechanic, at least how I define it, is the thing that defines the play. In a game, you have a set of rules, but the mechanic is the how of the game. Is it a first person shooter game? Is it a card game? What moves the game forward -- the turning over of cards say in Crazy 8, or the dealing of cards. The mechanic and rules can merge into one another but usually there is the "thing" of the game -- is it board game and are you using dice, player pieces, etc in a certain manner. That kind of thing.

What mechanic works best for what I'm doing?

Once again, I think I'm asking the wrong question. It's too open-ended. I can't just design anything because I do not have the programming skills -- so what I need to do is set constraints. I need to find a mechanic that I can do and adapt it to the game. This is I have tried to do, but I think I've been too dismissive of the mechanics. So I go back to mechanics to see if I can redesign one that works.

I want to get this done by Friday noon. I'll let you know how that goes. It's close.

On other fronts - got my bio to my former employer this week, just as they started their layoffs. 25% of the workforce is getting laid off -- for a company of 130, that's huge. Breaks my heart to see old friends, people I've known for years who have given a lot to this company, being let go. Ouch.

Started my Java course with my friend Carla who visited here this week. That looks completely doable so far. cheers, rani